IS MY HANDWRITING TOO SLOPPY FOR YOUR EYEBALLS? HERE'S THE TEXT OF THE ABOVE CARD ... HELYN GOLDBERG, CHAIRMAN / SOTHEBY'S / 188 EAST WALTON PLACE / CHICAGO, IL 60611
DEAR MS. GOLDBERG -- I AM A SOPHISTICATED AUCTION GUY, HAVING PARTICIPATED IN SEVERAL BIDDINGS ON EBAY (NOT INCLUDING THAT ODDLY SHAPED POTATO), AND I WOULD LIKE TO TRY MY HAND AT MANY SOTHEBY'S AUCTIONS ACROSS THE WORLD. PERHAPS MY REPUTATION PRECEDES ME? ANYWAY, SOME THINGS TO BE CLEAR BEFORE I BEGIN. 1) WILL I RECEIVE A BIDDING PADDLE, OR MAY I SIMPLY TWITCH MY NOSE? 2) MAY I HECKLE DOWN ITEMS SO AS TO THWART OTHER BIDDERS, E.G. SHOUTING "YOU CALL THAT ART?!?" 3) IS DRESS REQUIRED? WHEN THESE QUESTIONS ARE ANSWERED TO MY SATISFACTION WE'LL BE ALL SET! I HAVE HEARD THAT YOU ARE ONE OF SOTHEBY'S FINEST AUCTIONEERS (ALTHOUGH GRETCHEN PREFERS THAT LATIN GUY). I LOOK FORWARD TO WORKING WITH YOU (BUT NOT MARJORIE).